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    December 18

    这些对于我来说太奢侈

    不具备敲门砖
    这些对于我来说太过奢侈
    不具备拥有的能力
    天空总是下着小雨
    偶尔出现的阳光只能是海市蜃楼
    我无力挽留这一刻的美好

    一直都觉得是这样,无法改变的事实,朋友说命运靠自己改变,但是很多事情是力不从心无从改变
    懒得去折腾,无力去争取,碰触的那瞬间灿烂知道随后而来的是什么自己都十分清晰,一直都在存储记忆,
    保留点东西值得经后的受用时刻提醒自己省着点花,自己没有那么富有,省着的消费,
    这些让我想起小时候每每有好吃的都舍不得吃,每次都是小试一口回味无穷,想留住那感觉,可能那时候起就知道很多东西留不长
    日记的本身肩负着N多期许与功能,它是我的精神家园,我经后的绝对依靠,靠着这些走过每段。
    既然明明知道那些太奢侈,不具备拥有的能力就该学会去做自己没法做到的事情,虽然很难,但是允许自己做到部分,保留部分在文字中
    神啊多给我点力量,我知道这些力量来之不易,就让我奢侈的多拥有点行吗,祈祷~~~

    耳边流淌的音符是我一直喜欢的,亲切温暖,渐渐更加依赖这样的情绪,因为我不能拥有......
    轻轻的在耳边低喃,为什么今天听来和以往有所不样的情绪......
    心情有些低迷,或许更加肯定了自己的绝望,坚定了自己的想法
    远离从此封闭,远离这些没能力拥有的一切,乖乖的留在原地
    不配拥有,切记~~~
    因为没有承受悲伤的能力,幸福离的太遥远,远的我不知道它在哪个方向
    心在的方向,没有留驻的能力

    冬天来了,真的来了,不敢放逐自己,留在冬的美好
    我躲进暖暖的被窝想象,幻想着美好的一切,回忆着幸福的瞬间

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